drip drip drip

I don't know what it is, maybe I'm just over sensitive today after working for a million hours, or the fact that I'm home alone waiting for my adorable husband to come back to me, but this little video made me cry ...

a book I read

I enjoyed this book. I read it over a 4 day weekend and it only took so long because I had to stop reading to do stuff.
Yes, it's another smut novel, but I have found myself addicted to them again. I enjoy the lame plots and the dramatic characterization. It's great.
This book was entertaining. It's about a man "Lord Vale" and a woman "Melisande" who are thrown together when she proposes to him after he is left behind by his second fiancée. He says yes because he's curious and she asked because she has loved him from afar for many years.
Well They have to learn to be together and he has to overcome his challenges and she has to overcome hers. Does it work out? Well I'm not going to tell you, you just have to read it for yourself.

Stuck @ Tacoma Convention Center for Americas Got Talent auditions. The most boring 6 hours I've ever spent in WA.

This guy MUST be on my team. Singer, Song Writer, Berlesq Dancer.

Mmm lunch

Baby in a basket

food

Breakfast:

1 packet Cinnamon Roll Oatmeal

1 Yoplait Light fat Free Apple Turnover yogurt (interesting flavor)

 

Snack:

1 large orange

 

Lunch:

Left over Pad Thai

 

Snack:

20 Gummie Bears

 

Dinner:

6 small slices of cheese

1 large orange

1 Peanut Butter and Strawberry Preserves sandwich on whole wheat bread

 

Liquid:

4 20oz bottles of water (3 with slimquick powder packet drink mix)

 

 

ha ha

Step 1

New hair style :: Check

That's It!

I've had it! After going to a doctor’s appointment last week and having the scale blaring 226 at me I am reaffirming my goal to lose weight and keep it off.

If you have known me for a good deal of time you'll have noticed that I have gained A LOT of weight over the past few years. I was in denial for a long time. Until someone I respect a lot started calling me chubby a few years ago and I took a good long look in the mirror and realized she was right. I got fat somewhere along the way.

When I got married I was a good weight. At that point in time it was the heaviest I had ever been at 165, but I had come to terms with my body and realized that I was a nice healthy weight and I looked pretty good.

Shortly there after life happened and I found out the true meaning of depression. I am pretty sure that with the combination of birth control pills and depression medication I ballooned out to 209, which is what my drivers license states. Before I knew it the scale was up to 249 and I was wallowing in self-pity. I never wanted to be fat, but somehow it just happened.

And YES, fat does just happen.
You don't have to do anything to get it. Nothing.
You stop going outside.
You'd rather eat 3 doughnuts then a salad
You'd rather lie down and close your eyes then actively move about your house.
Your wardrobe consists of nothing but T-shirts and jeans (that rarely button on the first try)
You'd rather claw your eyes out then do any exercise of any type.

It’s a snowball effect. One thing leads to another until you find yourself curled up in bed at 5pm eating dinner off paper plates watching episode after episode of a canceled TV program...
Yes, that's my life. Pathetic, I know.

Then the doctor starts throwing out terms like, sleep apnea, hypertension, high cholesterol, heart problems, insulin resistance, infertility, polycystic ovary syndrome, pre-diabetic, asthma... Its a harsh reality when suddenly you realize that this could kill you if you don't do something about it.

Now here I am hating myself for being rotund. I can't buy cute clothes. I can't ride certain things at Lagoon because my but just barely fits. I have a closet full of clothes I can't wear. There are hairstyle I can't get away with. Glasses shapes that just don't look right. Necklaces that look great in the box but are suddenly too short when you add them to a corpulent neck.

I have always hated the term "Self-Esteem" because I never really related to the need for it most days because I generally liked myself after high school that is, but I have now fallen on to the category of low to no self-esteem. Next time you talk to me just see if I look you in the eye, it's not something I do very often, and I have started to wonder if it's because I don't want others to look into my eyes and see the self loathing that lies within.

When I had hit 249 I was going to Curves 3 times a week and trying to lose weight. My doctor even suggested that I do the Atkins diet. So I did for like 3 months and I lost 36 lbs and I was at 213 and I was so proud of myself, but then gas was $4.00 a gallon so I had to quit Curves and I couldn't stand not being able to eat a baked potato or pasta once in a while or the hot french bread that calls to me when I'm at the grocery store… so I fell off my diet - I have made changes to our eating habits that have stuck, but the next thing I knew I was back up to 220 but at least I stayed that way for a while. But the weight is slowly climbing back up - I'm sure my being sick for the past few months hasn't helped - and it's time to take it off.

Permanently.

I am not a believer in astrology, but I do read my horoscope everyday, and today my horoscope said: "Today you will be able to take a short step back in time to see what actually has been bothering you over the past few days, dear Capricorn. You will be able to determine where all the stress and mood swings have been coming from. In fact, it's up to you to figure out all of this on your own. This exercise could open your eyes to a lot of things you didn't know about yourself." This made me ponder about what is really getting to me, because I have been super moody this week, and I think I have come down to the fact that I'm fat. I have spent many an hour thinking about the fact that the scale at the doctor’s office said 226 lbs on Friday and even the scale at home agreed with it. I agree with it too. I need to lose weight.

According to the BMI Index I'm Obese with a BMI rating of 40.0 (it varies from site to site). Not just over weight, but severely obese. I hate that word. I don't want to be fat anymore. It makes me depressed. It’s a huge reason why I can't get pregnant, and if I really do have hypertension that could lead to heart problems and I don't want that. I want to be skinny and healthy and pregnant, but that's not going to happen until I do something about it.

So WE need to do something about it.

Sorry, I got on my soapbox, but when it comes down to it that is really what my issue is and that's what makes me sad and irritated and I just want to be the Liz that I was 7 years ago and not just the fat girl.

Here is my resolution. I WILL lose weight. I can't put it off any longer. No more hoe humming about it. It is time.

So what am I going to do about it?

Go to the doctor to fix my breathing
I have bought new clothes. Well, mostly just new shirts. If I look nice maybe it will make me feel better.
I painted my nails. Maybe the next step is make-up (but don't hold your breath)
I'm trying to find a nice hairstyle. I think I'm even going to dye it so it has that healthy shine again.
I have girls night once a month. To reaffirm that I am loved and I do have friends and I am my own person.
Cook more at home and not eat out so much. This way we will have lunches for the following day as well.
No more dinner on the bed. We eat at the table, or if we want to do dinner and a movie it's to the TV room.
Limit Soda intake. I have already cut down on my caffeine now to work on the carbonation.
Greatly reduce snack intake. The snack cupboard is almost empty. I'm tempted to leave it that way.
Eat better. Less carbs. Less sugar. More fresh fruits & Veggies. Less mindless eating.
No more emotional eating.
Exercise. Walking. Aerobics. Yoga. Anything that will get me active.
Get out of the house. This can tie in with exercise. But just being not home makes a difference.
Buy a WiiFit. It may just be a good investment.
Use the Core Rhythm DVD's that are gathering dust on my nightstand.
Make John do it too.
Pray for help.

Here are a few goals I have set for myself - measurable and attainable:

Notice that there aren't any "completed by" dates that way if I lose the weight slowly or quickly it wont make a difference as to whether or not I can reward myself.

Starting Weight: 226 (4/17/09)
Current Weight: 226

Goal Weight: 160

Goal 1: 215 - New shoes
Goal 2: 200 - Car detailing
Goal 3: 185 - Night out
Goal 4: 170 - A nice vacation

Goal 5: 160 - FINALLY having my bridals taken (7yrs later) - Michelle if you're reading this you could take them and add them to your portfolio.

BEFORE:

food

Today:

 

Breakfast:

2- packets of Cinnamon Roll Oatmeal

 

Snack:

7- individual Redvine brand nibs

1- Chocolate covered Cinnamon Bear

3- fun size Snickers

 

Lunch:

1- large orange

 

Dinner:

1 serving left over Pad Thai

 

Liquid:

4- 20oz bottles of water (3 with slimquick powder packet drink mix)

1 can Ginger Ale

 

 

Today's Capricorn Horoscope:

Apr 23, 2009

Today you will be able to take a short step back in time to see what actually has been bothering you over the past few days, dear Capricorn. You will be able to determine where all the stress and mood swings have been coming from. In fact, it's up to you to figure out all of this on your own. This exercise could open your eyes to a lot of things you didn't know about yourself. Make it as productive as possible.

My bruise

wow, the things i didn't know...

I saw this on the MSN Encarta site and thought you might be interested:

20 Things You Didn't Know About ... Death

1. The practice of burying the dead may date back 350,000 years, as evidenced by a 45-foot-deep pit in Atapuerca, Spain, filled with the fossils of 27 hominids of the species Homo heidelbergensis, a possible ancestor of Neanderthals and modern humans.

2. There are at least 200 euphemisms for death, including "to be in Abraham's bosom," "just add maggots" and "sleep with the Tribbles" (a "Star Trek" favorite).

3. No American has died of old age since 1951.

4. That was the year the government eliminated that classification on death certificates.

5. The trigger of death, in all cases, is lack of oxygen. Its decline may prompt muscle spasms, or the "agonal phase," from the Greek word "agon," meaning "contest."

6. Within three days of death, the enzymes that once digested your dinner begin to eat you. Ruptured cells become food for living bacteria in the gut, which release enough noxious gas to bloat the body and force the eyes to bulge outward.

7. So much for recycling: Burials in America deposit 827,060 gallons of embalming fluid -- formaldehyde, methanol and ethanol -- into the soil each year. Cremation pumps dioxins, hydrochloric acid, sulfur dioxide and carbon dioxide into the air.

8. Alternatively, a Swedish company, Promessa, will freeze-dry your body in liquid nitrogen, pulverize it with high-frequency vibrations and seal the resulting powder in a cornstarch coffin. They claim this "ecological burial" will decompose in six to 12 months.

9. Zoroastrians in India leave out the bodies of the dead to be consumed by vultures.

10. The vultures are now dying off after eating cattle carcasses dosed with diclofenac, an anti-inflammatory used to relieve fever in livestock.

11. Queen Victoria insisted on being buried with the bathrobe of her long-dead husband, Prince Albert, and a plaster cast of his hand.

12. If this doesn't work, we're trying in vitro! In Madagascar, families dig up the bones of dead relatives and parade them around the village in a ceremony called "famadihana." The remains are then wrapped in a new shroud and reburied. The old shroud is given to a newly married, childless couple to cover the connubial bed.

13. Sometimes, under the right conditions of temperature and humidity, fatty tissue of a buried body will turn to a soap-like substance called adipocere, or grave wax. Adipocere formation relies on a cold, damp environment and an absence of oxygen; once begun, this saponification can continue for centuries.

14. Well, yeah, there's a slight chance this could backfire: English philosopher Francis Bacon, a founder of the scientific method, died in 1626 of pneumonia after stuffing a chicken with snow to see if cold would preserve it.

15. For organs to form during embryonic development, some cells must commit suicide. Without such programmed cell death, we would all be born with webbed feet, like ducks.

16. In 1907, a Massachusetts doctor conducted an experiment with a specially designed deathbed and reported that the human body lost 21 grams upon dying. This has been widely held as fact ever since. It's not.

17. Buried alive: In 19th-century Europe there was so much anecdotal evidence that living people were mistakenly declared dead that cadavers were laid out in "hospitals for the dead" while attendants awaited signs of putrefaction.

18. Eighty percent of people in the United States die in a hospital.

19. More people commit suicide in New York City than are murdered.

20. It is estimated that 100 billion people have died since humans began.

 

Yay! Good News!

For the past 2 years the Quarry Visitors Center at This was really disappointing to me because I have developed a fascination in Dinosaurs in the last few years and have wanted to go out to Dinosaur National Monument several times but have either had no funds to do it or the sad closing of the Quarry Visitors Center.

But the good news I heard today was that the State is putting out $13 Million in stimulus money to rebuild the Quarry Visitors Center!

I'm way excited! I can't wait to have the chance to go stand among the dinos and to spend some time learning more of the fascinating story of the giants who roamed the earth.

Sure it may be silly of me, and the Quarry Visitors Center may not be rebuilt for many years, but I'm just excited. Yay!

As I have gotten older the more this speaks to me...

"Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young"

written by Mary Schmich

 

Inside every adult lurks a graduation speaker dying to get out, some world-weary pundit eager to pontificate on life to young people who'd rather be Rollerblading. Most of us, alas, will never be invited to sow our words of wisdom among an audience of caps and gowns, but there's no reason we can't entertain ourselves by composing a Guide to Life for Graduates.

I encourage anyone over 26 to try this and thank you for indulging my attempt.

Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97:

• Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
• Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
• Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.
• Do one thing every day that scares you.
• Sing.
• Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
• Floss.
• Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
• Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
• Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
• Stretch.
• Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
• Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
• Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.
• Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
• Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
• Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
• Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.
• Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
• Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.
• Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
• Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
• Travel.
• Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.
• Respect your elders.
• Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.
• Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.
• Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

As relevant in 2009 as it was in 1927

Desiderata

 

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.

 

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

 

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let not this blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

 

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

 

Therefore, be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams; it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful.

 

Strive to be happy.


--- Max Ehrmann, 1927

I'm grumpy today

I joined a weight loss support group on FertilityFriend.com where I have other fat girls to talk to and am able to vent about my weight frustration to someone other then my dear husband who always tells me that I am beautiful no matter how much I weigh.... In this group we weigh in once a week and set goals to reach. I haven't lost a single pound since I joined them, in fact I have gained 4 pounds in the past few weeks. Then after my disappointment at the doctor's office on Friday weighing in at 226 I refused to weigh myself on Monday. Isn't that sad Oh well. I have been grumpy and depressed most of this week and that has taken my will to exercise.

Sigh!

Monday I went to a family gathering for my dear husband's grandma's 86th birthday and had a hard time being there with everyone and their cute little happy families and the babies that abound there.  There was this group of people playing with their kids over there, and that other group of people over there playing with the babies. I actually had to text my husband across the room and tell him that I needed to leave because I didn't want to start crying in the middle of the party.

Then yesterday I had to go in and have blood taken to test for hypertension and I had to do a fasting blood sugar test so I couldn’t eat anything all day and I am not one who can survive on just water.... I finally made it to the Lab at about 4:30 pm and had 5 vials of blood taken! 5!! I don't know that I have ever given that much blood outside of the blood bank bus. wow! but here's to hoping that they find something wrong with me so I'm not just tired, fat and sick for no reason. I really don't mean to be a hypochondriac. So now my arm is bruised and sore. I hate giving blood. I'm currently waiting until I hear back from my doctor since I went to the lab so late yesterday after noon I probably wont hear back from them until this afternoon if I'm lucky. Ugh.

Anyway, that's my sob story for the week... but on the bright side Spring has finally arrived to Salt Lake city, and I have my tickets for U2 in Las Vegas which is really the brightest spot of them all.

 

I have set some weight loss goals. Notice that there aren't any "completed by" dates that way if I lose the weight slowly or quickly it wont make a difference as to whether or not I can reward myself.

 

Starting Weight: 226 (4/17/09)
Current Weight: 226
Goal Weight: 160
Goal 1: 215 - New Shoes
Goal 2: 200 - Car Detail
Goal 3: 185 - Night Out
Goal 4: 170 - Vacation
Goal 5: 160 - FINALLY having my bridals taken (7yrs later)

 

Mmmm. Oatmeal.

count them ...

5 vials of Blood today.

after having to fast ALL day for my blood sugar test they go and take 5 vials of blood and then sent me out into the world with no food. how rude!

Look what my great husband found for only $10. Current selling price (if you can find it) $50+.

Oh yes, and we can't forget ...

 

Insulin Resistance and Pre-Diabetes -

Insulin resistance is a condition in which the body produces insulin but does not use it properly.

 

Poetry for the day

Song

I will pluck from my tree a cherry-blossom wand, And carry it in my merciless hand, So I will drive you, so bewitch your eyes, With a beautiful thing that can never grow wise.  Light are the petals that fall from the bough, And lighter the love that I offer you now; In a spring day shall the tale be told Of the beautiful things that will never grow old.  The blossoms shall fall in the night wind, And I will leave you so, to be kind: Eternal in beauty, are short-lived flowers, Eternal in beauty, these exquisite hours.  I will pluck from my tree a cherry-blossom wand, And carry it in my merciless hand, So I will drive you, so bewitch your eyes, With a beautiful thing that shall never grow wise.  	-- Anna Wickham

What do I have??

To Learn More Follow These Links:

 

Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) -

Polycystic ovary syndrome (say "pah-lee-SIS-tik OH-vuh-ree SIN-drohm") is a problem in which a woman’s hormones are out of balance. It can cause problems with your periods and make it difficult to get pregnant. PCOS may also cause unwanted changes in the way you look. If it is not treated, over time it can lead to serious health problems, such as diabetes and heart disease.

 

Hypertension / High Blood Pressure -

Blood pressure is the force of blood pushing against blood vessel walls. The heart pumps blood into the arteries (blood vessels), which carry the blood throughout the body. High blood pressure, also called hypertension, is dangerous because it makes the heart work harder to pump blood to the body and it contributes to hardening of the arteries or atherosclerosis and the development of heart failure.

 

 

grr!

Okay, so I haven't taken the full step to OB/Gyn or RE yet. I am hanging on to my CNM for all she’s worth right now. I'm if-y about changing doctors since I have been going to the same one for a few years now. 

 

I had one of “those” appointments on Friday. Just the yearly visit, blah blah blah.  I really like Vivian, she is always very proactive when it comes to my health, where sometimes it seems like our family doctor isn’t listing to me.

 

What did she tell me??

 

Well she gave me the third degree about my weight - 226! according to the scale at her office - just like I was sure she would.  

 

The conversation went something like this:

Her: have you still been going to Curves?

Me: No.

Her: Do you exercise regularly?

Me: do the stairs at work count?

Her: Have you changed your diet?

Me: I'm trying

 

... Every time I go in she reminds me "Less carbs, more protein!"

 

Then she had to take my blood pressure 3 times! I don’t remember what the exact #’s were, but I remember looking at the monitor and seeing 158/something. That’s high. She is now worried that I may have hypertension/high blood pressure. Add that right on top of Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) and Pre-diabetes that she has previously diagnosed me with and it is just frustrating.

 

So I have been given a lab order to go have a ton of blood taken. She also wants to do a fasting blood sugar test so I haven't been in to the lab yet since I had eaten that day. But I will.

 

She says that she wants to get that under control before we move any further with trying to conceive.

 

That is super disappointing -- but she is right I do need to be healthy before I can take care of someone else.

 

Starting tomorrow I am putting Core Rhythms in the DVD player and forcing my dear husband to participate. He could stand to lose a few pounds too.

 

 

it's a little late ...

But here is the Easter message from the LDS church. Remember we are NOT alone.

"One of the great consolations of this Easter season is that because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so."
- Jeffrey R. Holland

Another interesting item

did you know

April 25 - May 2, 2009

Its funny how many people have asked me if these are real. BTW - I found the right color red!

International Year of Astronomy

This is something interesting that I learned today.

 

Welcome to IYA!

In the year 2009, the world will celebrate the International Year of Astronomy as it commemorates the 400th anniversary of Galileo’s use of a telescope to study the skies, and Kepler’s publication of Astronomia Nova. 2009 is also the anniversary of many other historic events in science, including Huygen’s 1659 publication of Systema Saturnium.This will be modern astronomy’s quadricentennial, and the 2009 Year of Astronomy will be an international celebration of numerous astronomical and scientific milestones.

Spread the word: the Universe is yours to discover. Come celebrate in 2009.

 

Here is the website - http://astronomy2009.us/

I Dreamed a Dream

WOW! this seriously brought tears to my eyes. Does that make me pathetic or just a softy. I would love to be able to sing that well! AMAZING! What a beautiful inspiration to us all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luRmM1J1sfg

Jelly Beans

    So, I was looking at my hands yesterday morning and noticing how long my fingernails had gotten and said to John. I think I either need to cut my fingernails or paint them red. Surprisingly he said "Paint them red"... and I thought to myself 'I haven't painted my fingernails in so long, it might be fun to paint them.'

    That took me on a quest to my local Wal-Mart to find the perfect color. I wanted a nice Fire Engine Red, but that is harder to find then I thought. There was Ruby Red and Red Carpet Red and a million other shades of red in-between but nothing came close to the Red that I really wanted.

    When I was a teenager I had shoeboxes full of nail polish in almost every color imaginable along with some clear coat and some glow in the dark. I loved having my nails painted. My favorite colors were always black and orange in so many varieties. Sometimes one hand would be one color and the other hand the other color, or alternating finger tips or my favorite the Black & Orange french manicure. I have no idea what ever happened to my boxes of finger colors. I bet their still at moms house. They have all probably dried out by now, so mom, if you find them you can just throw it all away. . .

    But back to my quest for the perfect red ... My eldest sister is notorious for having painted nails. It's mostly just her toe nails these days, but I remember when she was a teenager she would have her finger nails painted and it annoyed our father to no end. I always loved her bright red polish and in many ways I think she is one of the reasons I painted my nails so much as a youngster. I tried to emulate her in so many ways because she was my favorite and I thought she was uber-cool.

    I think I love red polish so much because it is such a flashy color and it is just fun. I have memories of one or the other (or both) of my parents referring to red polish as a trampy color and I always thought that was funny. Not that I want my nail polish to label me as a tramp, but I do love the bright colors.

     I finally settled on Red Carpet which once applied is more of a pinkish-red, which is not at all what I was looking for. Boo hoo so sad, I'll have to stop at Walgreens on the way home and see if they have the color I want. 

    It has been so long since I have had my nails polished that they are a little distracting today. Every time my hands move my nails catch my eye and they remind me of red jelly beans. The middle sister did remind me today not to try and eat my jelly bean fingers, and I know that that is good advice because as Willy Wonka told Charlie "even *I'm* eatable! But that is called "cannibalism," my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies."  
    It also seems to be effecting my ability to type as I have missed tons of letters in words as well as grossly misspelling things. Funny how something so simple can have such and impact on your motor functions.

    Well, now that you have read this rambling blog about my fingernails I'll let you return to your hum-drum lives that can't be half as exciting as my fingernails.

"Where's John?" she asks.

hmmm...

Well it seems that everyone blogged about their kids for Easter ... what do I have to blog about....



Well to start with, this is what I found when I came home from work today. This is Mahana's handy work for sure since she did the exact same thing last night while we were trying to sleep.












And then here is my precious Noranti just watching the chaos. That's her "Mahana is making noise and I'm angry" face.

Tuan tuan sleeping bag

This is totally Awesome!!  

For the star wars geek in all of us. 

 

~_~_~_~_~_~ 

 

From the entrail-lined interior to the lightsaber zipper pole, this sleeping bag from ThinkGeek.com is every kid's dream (or rather every kid's geeky father's dream). Unfortunately, it turned out to be an elaborate April Fool's joke. But there is hope yet for Tauntaun lovers. ThinkGeek now has a note on their website saying that due to the "overwhelming tsunami of requests," they are going to try and and bring this to life. 

 

   

 

 

monitoring my intake

I feel much better about my food choices today in relation to what I had eaten on Friday...

 

Today I have eaten:
a little bag of grapes
a strawberry yogurt
a banana
and some fresh strawberries

For lunch I will have:
left-over Ham and Cheesy Potatoes and a roll

snack:
2 Hard Boiled Eggs (one Yellow and one Blue)

For dinner tonight the plan is:
Chicken Enchiladas made with low carb tortillas and reduced fat sour cream - - they are so yummy...

Here is the recipe incase anyone missed it the last time it was posted here:

~ Liz's Enchiladas ~

3-4 giant Table spoons of Sour Cream
Half a can of Cream of Chicken Soup
1 or 2 Cooked & Chopped Chicken Breasts
Lots of Cheese probably 3 cups or so
1 can of enchilada sauce
6-8 Flour Tortillas

**
Heat oven to 350 degrees

Mix Sour Cream, Chicken, Soup and a couple hand fulls of cheese and one spoon full of enchilada sauce. Cover bottom of 8x8 in pan or 9x13 pan (depends on how much you want to squish to get everything in the pan) with some enchilada sauce. Fill tortillas with about 2 table spoons of filling each. Roll and place in pan. Cover with the rest of the enchilada sauce. Cook for 20-25 minutes add some more cheese on top and cook for about 5 minutes more.

Serve with rice. Yum. 

If desired you could also add chili peppers, tomatoes, onion, whatever sounds good in an enchilada. But they really are good just the way they are.

I grew that

Look Up

On this Good Friday a friend of mine had this posted on her blog, and I just wanted to share it because it really touched me and brought tears to my eyes.

"When Christ rose from the grave, becoming the firstfruits of the Resurrection, He made that gift available to all. And with that sublime act, He softened the devastating, consuming sorrow that gnaws at the souls of those who have lost precious loved ones.
"I think of how dark that Friday was when Christ was lifted up on the cross. On that terrible Friday the earth shook and grew dark. Frightful storms lashed at the earth. Those evil men who sought His life rejoiced. Now that Jesus was no more, surely those who followed Him would disperse. On that day they stood triumphant. On that day the veil of the temple was rent in twain. Mary Magdalene and Mary, the mother of Jesus, were both overcome with grief and despair. The superb man they had loved and honored hung lifeless upon the cross.
"On that Friday the Apostles were devastated. Jesus, their Savior—the man who had walked on water and raised the dead—was Himself at the mercy of wicked men. They watched helplessly as He was overcome by His enemies.
"On that Friday the Savior of mankind was humiliated and bruised, abused and reviled. It was a Friday filled with devastating, consuming sorrow that gnawed at the souls of those who loved and honored the Son of God. I think that of all the days since the beginning of this world’s history, that Friday was the darkest.
"But the doom of that day did not endure. The despair did not linger because on Sunday, the resurrected Lord burst the bonds of death. He ascended from the grave and appeared gloriously triumphant as the Savior of all mankind.
"And in an instant the eyes that had been filled with ever-flowing tears dried. The lips that had whispered prayers of distress and grief now filled the air with wondrous praise, for Jesus the Christ, the Son of the living God, stood before them as the firstfruits of the Resurrection, the proof that death is merely the beginning of a new and wondrous existence.
"Each of us will have our own Fridays—those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces. We all will experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again. We will all have our Fridays.
"But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow, Sunday will come.
"No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, Sunday will come. In this life or the next, Sunday will come."

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin"Sunday Will Come", Ensign, Nov 2006, 28–30

Look Up

On this Good Friday a friend of mine had this posted on her blog, and I just wanted to share it because it really touched me and brought tears to my eyes.

"When Christ rose from the grave, becoming the firstfruits of the Resurrection, He made that gift available to all. And with that sublime act, He softened the devastating, consuming sorrow that gnaws at the souls of those who have lost precious loved ones.

"I think of how dark that Friday was when Christ was lifted up on the cross. On that terrible Friday the earth shook and grew dark. Frightful storms lashed at the earth. Those evil men who sought His life rejoiced. Now that Jesus was no more, surely those who followed Him would disperse. On that day they stood triumphant. On that day the veil of the temple was rent in twain. Mary Magdalene and Mary, the mother of Jesus, were both overcome with grief and despair. The superb man they had loved and honored hung lifeless upon the cross.

"On that Friday the Apostles were devastated. Jesus, their Savior—the man who had walked on water and raised the dead—was Himself at the mercy of wicked men. They watched helplessly as He was overcome by His enemies.

"On that Friday the Savior of mankind was humiliated and bruised, abused and reviled. It was a Friday filled with devastating, consuming sorrow that gnawed at the souls of those who loved and honored the Son of God. I think that of all the days since the beginning of this world’s history, that Friday was the darkest.

"But the doom of that day did not endure. The despair did not linger because on Sunday, the resurrected Lord burst the bonds of death. He ascended from the grave and appeared gloriously triumphant as the Savior of all mankind.

"And in an instant the eyes that had been filled with ever-flowing tears dried. The lips that had whispered prayers of distress and grief now filled the air with wondrous praise, for Jesus the Christ, the Son of the living God, stood before them as the firstfruits of the Resurrection, the proof that death is merely the beginning of a new and wondrous existence.

"Each of us will have our own Fridays—those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces. We all will experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again. We will all have our Fridays.

"But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow, Sunday will come.

"No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, Sunday will come. In this life or the next, Sunday will come."

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin
"Sunday Will Come", Ensign, Nov 2006, 28–30

"Feed Me Seymore!!"

I'm really hungry today and I just want to eat stuff, but I have run out of snacks at my desk and I don't think I need to eat more of my Chef Boyardee cups. I want to eat the twizzlers that are on the counter at home. I don't need the food though it will all just make me fat.

I think that maybe I'm just bored and eating is the only thing I have to do since actually doing my work today has escaped me.

This is what I have eaten today are we ready for the excitement ...

Breakfast: (between 5-9 am)
8 oz Water

1 Twizzler before leaving my house
1 Strawberry Yogurt
1 Jell-O snack - sugar free
6 more Twizzlers that I stuck in my lunch bag
1 piece of Spearmint gum

Second Breakfast: (10-11am)
2 packets of Instant Oatmeal Cinnamon Roll flavored (yum)
1 Cadbury Caramel Egg
Hand full of gummie bears
8oz of water
8oz of Dr. Pepper

then I sat around starving for another hour before it was lunch time.

Lunch: (noon)
7.5 oz Chef Boyardee Beefaroni
1 piece of Spearmint gum
8 oz of Dr. Pepper - - at least the bottle is empty now

Afternoon Snack: (2 pm)
1 Cadbury cream egg

I did turn down the cookies sitting on our community table, and didn't take up the offer for a second lunch (though it was salad and I probably should have had that instead of Beefaroni)

Now I'm just sitting here craving more Twizzlers.....

Movies, Movies, Movies

Monsters vs. Aliens 3D - This movie was okay. It wasn't really great, but maybe that's because I had really been looking forward to seeing this movie that all my excitement over it just fell kind of flat while watching it. Now, don't get me wrong, the movie was still relatively good. It made me laugh several times and it could have been great if there were some things left out. Maybe I've hit that "adult" stage where stupid 3rd grade jokes just aren't funny to me anymore.

 

A Wrinkle in Time - This is a Disney movie I have been meaning to see for years it came out in 2004. I love the books by Madeleine L'Engle and have always been a fan of Meg and Charles Wallace so when this was made into a movie I wanted to see it. So now, 5 years later I finally sat down and watched it. I'll admit, I haven't read the books since Jr. High but the movie reminded me of so many things I enjoyed about the books. There are a lot of differences between print and the screen, but all in all it was a good adaptation.

 

Jumper - I was warned that this movie was not very good and kind of boring, so I had some low expectations. I liked this movie. I wanted more action and more back story, but all in all I enjoyed it for the most part. I think that maybe I'll read the books by Steven Gould to get more of the story. I guess there are 3 books regarding the Jumper story. They might be an interesting read. I don't think the movie was good enough to warrant a sequel.

Codeine or no Codeine?

I have had some really strange dreams the past few days that my doctor has put me back on Codeine Cough Syrup ...

 

The first night of strange dreams I dreamed that I was back in elementary school and I started walking home but crazy Frank and his son Matthew told me to come ride the bus home with them. Even though I argued that the bus route didn't go to our street I started to cross the street to stand with them at the bus stop but I got hit by a car on my way over. A bunch of cars stopped to check on me but I mumbled to them that I was fine and then slipped into unconsciousness. When I woke up I was still laying in the road and all the cars were gone so I pushed myself up off the road and even though I was a twisted and broken with one leg dragging behind me I hobbled to the bus stop just as the bus closed it's doors and drove away. I fell down on the grass and waited to die, but when that didn't happen I had to pick myself up again and start walking home. It was snowing. As I hobbled to main street there was a Porsche show and everyone was getting rides in Porsches but I just needed to cross the street so I dragged myself across the street but people kept honking at me for being in the way. When I finally did get across the street I made it down Center Street to the church before falling over again. ... I think this is where I woke up, I don't remember ever getting home on my broken leg.

 

At nap time I dreamed I was driving home from work and I merged into another lane and put my foot on the gas to pass the slow car next to me when suddenly the back-hoe in front of me stopped and my car went careening into  the back of it -- causing me to jump myself awake a full 2 minutes before my alarm was supposed to go off.

 

Then while sleeping last night I had several dreams that scared me awake for one reason or another... the first dream I don't really remember what was happening in it I just remember that I was shot several times before I could wake up.

 

My second dream was that John, Jessica and myself were investigating a haunted Wal-Mart and amidst the dream we were told that we could take any doll we wanted (because there were random creepy dolls all over the store0 but we couldn't take anything else. Well apparently I wasn't listening because I put a chair and a lamp in the back seat of the car but then I heard the restrictions so I said to myself "I'll out them back in a minute and I went into the office to talk to someone but when I came back out the ghosts had clawed Jessica's eyes out and she was bleeding all over my car.

 

The final dream of my night was that the same person I talked to in the office in my last dream was a crazy OCD lady who had to sign everything. If there was a line for a signature on anything she would have to sign it. So I was having her sign a bunch of paperwork and when I was done there was one line left unsigned because it was for someone else to sign, but she HAD to sign it and I wouldn't let her. So I left the office and went on my merry way. Well, this crazy lady went to the pet department and bought a gold fish and stuck it in the irrigation ditch and commanded it to find me and eat me. So my dream progressed though the fish's point of view as it swam through the ditch trying to find me and eat me. It ate a bunch of things along it's way so it got bigger and bigger as it went. When it finally found me the point of view switched back to me and I saw the fish coming with a mouth full of spiders and so I grabbed a branch that was hanging over the ditch so that the fish would just get swept by and not get me, but as I hung onto the branch a spider bit me and I woke up before I fell in the ditch. . .

 

How's that for interesting . I think it's gotta be the cough syrup because I don't recall having such strange dreams otherwise.

I don't mean to sound totally insensitive, but this quote from the mayor in L'Aquila Italy is just absurd ...

"For now the needs are basic. The people in the camps, they don't have toothbrushes, they don't have toothpaste," said Massimo Cialente, mayor of the hard-hit city of L'Aquila. "You can't find a place to buy cigarettes or get a coffee."

I didn't know that cigarettes and coffee were a basic need. Here I'd think water and shelter and food. silly me.

What do you do when you are caught wasting company time.

You say you have to stop to participate in a religious practice. That way they can’t do anything with violating your human rights. LOL!
You can tell them that you were working and then when they complain about the time. You swear that you were working and as they persist you get concerned. Then as you contemplate what is going on you have two options. 1. Claim you were abducted again by aliens. 2. Claim some horrible brain tumor, or disease. Then before they can say anything else bust into tears screaming “why!”
How about you claim gremlins came and destroyed your work so you had to start over.
You could claim that the voices in you head took a vote and you all agree, “work is stupid and so are you.” Then turn around and continue what you were doing.
You can pull the fire alarm and then that makes it so you don’t have to work and no one cares because you are all outside. If you get caught you just turn and look very angry and say it was your evil twin out to ruin you.
There is always the route of when called about the hours insist that you have a computer problem and it doesn’t work right. Insist that they come take a look then have them monkey with your computer. Have them wait there while you take a cup and go get a glass of water. When you return and they tell you it is working fine. Pour the water inside the computer. Then say “It sure looks like it’s got a problem to me.”
My personal favorite is when management comes to complain about the time. You say you are doing fine. When they question you again you put your arm around them and very quietly tell them that you are very strongly connected to the mob. That you would hate to have this incident ruin your professional relation ship. Then point your finger like a gun and wink at them as you send them back to there office. Then arrange for little accident to happen to them through the week. Making sure you are always there to point out how horrible that was. Of course having a solid alibi the whole time.
I forgot about the one where you bring your desk orgier to work and when they come to give you a hard time you hit them over the head knocking them unconscious. Then you feed them to desk orger. And no one is the wiser. Make sure you give the club you used to the orger as well for him to eat.