Goodbye 2009, I wont miss you

I weighed myself this morning and the scale said .... 230

Ugh! So much for losing 5lbs by the end of the year, it looks like I gained some. Bleh. But my new treadmill comes to my house on Monday so hopefully that will help in the weight loss department.
I have decided that I can't join a gym because my exercise schedule doesn't fit with their business hours and I can't go outside walking because there is 2 feet of snow and bad air quality in the winter and it's too blasted hot in the summer. So I figured if I had a treadmill I could get on it any time I want and walk for as long as I need too. I can even walk and read at the same time and not worry about being hit by a car. I can walk at night when I want too and I can walk while my the Creator plays video games. and he can get on and walk off all his post-workday energy that drives me crazy some times when I just want to relax and he feels that he NEEDS to do something.
All in all, I think the treadmill will be a good thing for both of us. And, I have a sister-in-law who has decided that we should workout together in our own homes so we are both going to start the Couch to 5K on the same day and cheer each other on. That way we can (again) workout on our own schedules but aim at the same goal.
I hope this helps me because I'm ready to find the thinner me.
Besides, I have to get in shape if I want to go to Disneyland in February and not have it bee like last time when I was at my heaviest and I was so tired and worn out and my feet hurt like crazy after only 2 days and I still had 2 days left. I don't want to do that again. I want to get from one end of the park to the other without dying or having my butt get stuck on one of the rides in their tiny little seats.
Alright, that is all for this morning. It's time to get to work.

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Movie Watching

Our usual rentals:

Crank 2: High Voltage

Last Chance Harvey

Eagle Eye

 

Things we own:

Farscape, Seasons 3 and 4

Farscape: The Peace Keeper Wars

 

In Honor of Lari this month:

Help!

Toys

Meet Me in St. Louis

 

Listen to the Cat Carol

Read

The Cat Carol Lyrics

here.

don't cry.

The worlds saddest song.

 Seriously, I sat here at my desk and just started crying. I'm such a sap.

 

*~*~*~*~~

 

 

The Cat Carol

The cat wanted in to the warm warm house,
but no one would let the cat in
It was cold outside on Christmas Eve,
She meowed and meowed by the door.

The cat was not let in the warm warm house,
And her tiny cries were ignored.
'twas a blizzard now, the worst of the year,
There was no place for her to hide.

Just then a poor little mouse crept by,
He had lost his way in the snow.
He was on his last legs and was almost froze,
The cat lifted him with her paw.

She said "Poor mouse do not be afraid,
because this is Christmas Eve.
"On this freezing night we both need a friend,
"I won't hurt you - stay by my side."

She dug a small hole in an icy drift,
This is where they would spent the night.
She curled herself 'round her helpless friend,
Protecting him from the cold.

Oooooo

When Santa came by near the end of the night,
the reindeer started to cry.
They found the cat lying there in the snow,
and they could see that she had died.

They lifted her up from the frozen ground,
and placed her into the sleigh.
It was then they saw the little mouse wrapped up,
she had kept him warm in her fur.

"Oh thank you Santa for finding us!
"Dear cat wake up we are saved!"
..."I'm sorry mouse but your friend has died,
there's nothing more we can do.

"On Christmas Eve she gave you her life,
the greatest gift of them all."
Santa lifted her up into the night sky,
and laid her to rest among the stars.

"Dear mouse don't cry you are not alone,
you will see your friend every year.
"Each Christmas a Cat Constellation will shine,
to remind us that her love's still here."

Oooooooo

Update about me ..

Well, I had my appointment with an actual MD - OB/GYN instead of my CNM yesterday. It was my initial consultation for "infertility". It went pretty well aside from the fact that she was running back and forth between her office and the birthing center because she had a laboring mother and a distressed baby. I waited in the waiting room for an hour, and then in her office for another 45 minutes before she ever showed up. Understandable, yes, but completely frustrating. I almost got up and walked out several times.  It stressful enough already admitting to someone outside of my family that it's taken so long to get pregnant, but being forced to sit in an office for 2 hours stressing over it and losing courage and thinking about all the things my insurance wont cover... it was killing me.

 

I finally said I'm leaving in 15 minutes of she doesn't show... and then she arrived. We discussed all the usual. How long have you been trying? How much do you weigh? Did your mom have problems? Are you shaped like your mom? Has your husband had a sperm analysis? What do you eat? What did you have for dinner last night? What are your cycles like? How long? How much? Last one? Blah blah blah… and all these questions were punctuated by her ringing phone and her having to pop out of the office again and again.

 

Ugh!

 

In the end it was concluded that I need to lose weight. At least 10% meaning 23 lbs according to the scale at her office yesterday.  That was really no surprise to me, I know I’m over-weight, thanks for pointing that out. Again.

 

I have also been scheduled to go in on 1/25 for a Sonohystogram. That’s my 8^th anniversary.. What a fun way to spend the afternoon together :P

 

It’s supposed to be done 5-7 days after the first day for menses, so if my system follows the pattern it has been, it will fall in that area. However, if it comes early or late I have to reschedule the whole thing. While they are doing the sonohystogram they are going to shoot some air bubbles up my tubes to make sure they are clear.

 

That’s the first step. She is putting this all under coding for Anovulatory so the insurance company will cover it.  Nice for me. She didn’t take any blood or do any tests yesterday because she was so busy, but she is requesting all the blood-work from our family doctor that was done a few months ago, when I was having my crazy dizzy spells, so she can see what tests she doesn’t have to run.

 

Now I’m one step closer to knowing what is wrong with me and why on earth I can’t get pregnant. I’m afraid that in the end I’ll just fall into that “Unexplained” category and just worry and fret for the rest of my fertile years about why I can’t have the one thing I want the most in life.  But it is a step.

Music

I have had a lot on my mind lately, but I haven't really had the time or energy to sit down and write it out either for my blog or for myself. I really do need to start keeping a journal, but some days that's just too much to ask of me. And if I did go back to journaling, do I go back and cover the last eight years of my life, or do I just start with today and go forward?

Lets touch on some of the "things" going on in my life:

First of all, I have been wanting to write a post about music. Or most notably, the lack of it in my life for the last few years.

Note: As many of you may remember, the Creator and I stopped listening to the radio back in December of 2007 when my favorite DJ vanished from the airwaves. I still will not listen to 101.9, but my opinions about the radio are changing.

Since we stopped listening to the radio I have had more time in my life to peruse my 400+ CD collection and rediscover some old ditties that I have missed over the years, but I have also discovered that there are a lot of songs I miss that I don’t (or didn’t) own. Here is where iTunes comes into play.

Note: iTunes is dangerous.

I have also borrowed a lot of different music from siblings and friends to complete my collections. I have discovered a lot of music I love, but a lot of music that I can’t stand.
I like to think of myself as a well rounded music connoisseur, however there is a limit to my love.

Due to recent developments, though, we have been forced to turn back on the radio and see what else is out there.

What recent events you may be wondering?
For starters, the CD player in my car refuses to eject the current CD. Thank Heavens that the disk in there is an MP3 disk with 160 song on, or that would be annoying… but than again, listening to the same 160 songs again and again and again also gets annoying….
Secondly, the Creator and I had discussed a few months ago that we needed some new music to spice up our regular hum-drum selections.

Tangent: I hate Hate HATE not being able to eject the CD that’s in the player. I wish I could listen to MY Christmas music in the car. I want to make a CD of all MY new music so I can listen to what I want. But the stereo is built into the dash in this crazy square shape. Can I buy a replacement for it that wont bee to small or to wide or to big that will look right and be self (or brother) installed. Or do I have to take it to the freakin’ dealer and have them charge me an arm and a leg to get it fixed?? And why on earth is there and AUX button if I can’t hook anything up to it? I’d like to just be able to plug in my iPod and call it good, that way I wouldn’t have to worry about a stuck CD or what station I was listening to.

Since it came down to only having one CD to listen to in the car, one day I pushed the AM/FM button and opened myself up to the world of new music.

FYI: What stations do I listen to now:
My 99.5
Movin’ 100.7
The Mix 107.9

There is a lot of pretty good new stuff out there that I have missed over the last few years.

When Lady GaGa opened for the New Kids on the Block last November I was unimpressed. She looked like trash, and the music was terrible. Since then I have decided that it may have just been the acoustics of the E-Center because I like most of her music that I have heard. It fun, catchy and it’s got a beat you can dance to (even though I do not dance.) It’s the kind of music you can jack up the volume on the stereo and just enjoy the beat.

Sad to say a Miley Cirus song has also been added to our repertoire. It started out as just a fun song on the radio that we would mock every time it came on. And soon we found ourselves singing along and enjoying it, and then it needed to be added to the iPod so we bought it. I didn’t know, until I clicked the “buy” button in iTunes, that the song belonged to Hanna Montana herself. But we like it, and are proud of it.

Another song that I have struggled with liking is “Tik Toc” by Ke$ha. It’s a dumb song, but I find it gets stuck in my head all the time…



But one of the most annoying parts about that song is how it perfectly transitions into L’Trimm and “Cars That Go Boom”



Note: I find myself saying all the time “We're Tigre and bunny and we like the boom. We like the cars, the cars that go boom”

Tangent: Tigra and Bunny take me back to the days of “The Boom Box” and my older brother installing car stereos. It seemed there was always a car on the lawn and a speaker box half constructed kicking around the house. But most of all it takes me to the sound. I like the “boooom” give me a subwoofer any day over the tinny sound of a factory issued car stereo. I secretly loved to ride in the back seat of Z’s old blue and tan Mustang when the subwoofers were thumping. I love the feeling of my teeth rattling and feeling the sound rumble through my chest. To this day I love going to movies that are so loud you can feel the noise. When the explosions are so loud it rumbles your entire body. Love it. Those days are the reason I put out the extra dough for the Subwoofer on my computer. “Cars That Go Boom” makes me smaile every time.
Sub-Tangent: I recall a car ride in the back of previously mentioned Mustang with a song thumping in the back ground. The only words to the song that I can remember are “Milk and Cereal” can any of my brothers fill me in on what that annoying song was?
Sub-sub-Tangent: Speaking of annoying songs, Periodically I also get the Korn version of “Knick Knack Paddy-Whack” stuck in my head. Ugh! But then it turns to The Blood Hound Gang and it alternates between “The Roof is On Fire” and “Why’s Everybody Always Pickin’ on Me”

And then, just yesterday, after a great moral struggle, I purchased “I Gotta Feeling” by the Black Eyed Peas. I don’t want to like them. I don’t want to listen to their music, but this song got stuck with the Creator after the U2 concert and it was a must buy for him. He likes it. And I will begrudgingly admit that I like it too.

Well, This blog is getting super long so I’ll stop with the music discussion for now, but you can expect it to continue at some point further along the way because I recently acquired a lot of music from my brother-in-law and the CD’s that used to belong to Lariann. Right now they’re in plastic grocery bags that keep getting moved from one end of the house to the other… as of last night they are sitting in the doorway of the spare room and the black abyss that becomes for anything that gets put in there. I’ll have to get to them soon before they are swallowed up.

Ha Ha ... I'm one of "those" people

How do you move and Item out of your house within an hour?

Make the item as cool as possible.

 

 

Really, can you top that?

I really think that Data and Darth helped sell the cat house.

I posted this ad on ksl.com last night at 6:20pm...

The thing was sold and out of my house by 7:17pm.

Nice, huh?

 

 

Random Liz' information

I had to fill this out for work today so I thought I'd add it to my blog. Random information about me.

 

I am…

 

Name	Elizabeth “Liz” Evans
Job Title	Credentialing Coordinator
Previous jobs in company	Former Oklahoma Plan Lead, Currently the Altius Plan Lead and Arkansas Plan Lead
Length of time in CVC	A little over 2 years
Length of time in company	A little over 2 years
Hobbies & Interests	Sleeping, Reading, Writing, Painting, Photography, Singing, Stars, Rain, RPG Video Games, Dungeons and Dragons, Cats, Blogging
Family/Significant Other/Children	Married to John since 1/25/2002
Pets	I have 2 cats, Mahana and Noranti (Ma-HA-na and No-RAN-tea) Ages 5 years and 4 years respectively.
Things I did in a “previous life” (before CHC)	I have worked in the world of Credentialing for almost 7 years now. My previous job was at CompHealth in their CVO for nearly 5 years. Before that I had many, many jobs that covered all the basics – ie, KB Toys, Intercontinental Hotel Reservations, JC Penney Catalog call center, Merchandising at the local amusement park called Lagoon, Nanny for 4 kids, Candy department at the local department store, and I even sold popcorn  at a movie theater. I think there was even one day of Hotel Housekeeping in there somewhere and another day of telemarketing, but since those were only 8 hours each I forget about them most of the time.
One statement that describes me	“ARRRRRGH!”
Other things I would like people to know about me	Favorite Movies: Stardust, Ever After, Troll, Tristan & Isolde, The Chronicles of Riddick, Transporter, Moulin Rouge, Star Wars: Episode I, Sliding Doors, Watcher in the Woods, Disney’s Hercules, The Mummy Favorite Music: U2, Cherie Call, New Kids on the Block, BNL, Dave Matthews Band, Hootie and the Blowfish, Most Musicals   Favorite Books: The Princess Bride, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Herman the Brave Pig, The Wheel of Time Series, Lord of the Flies, The Scarlet Pimpernel, The Phantom of the Opera   Favorite Holiday: Talk Like a Pirate Day (September 19th – every year)

Request for change -

Dear Santa,

Forget all of my other requests. All we NEED for Christmas this year is a Snow Blower.

Thanks.

Nov 18th Cycle

Everybody Can-Can!!

Hi Everyone! Happy December. :)

 

Well, I don’t even know where to begin. John and I both ended up with Strep last week. That was no fun for us, but we are feeling much better now. I hate being sick. I hate having a sore throat, I hate the Doctor’s office…  It’s bad enough when one of us is sick, heaven forbid we’re both sick at the same time that makes 2 very angry tired and irritable people in my house. But we survived. I was a little worried about my temps this week since I was feverish for 3 days last week (100 degrees +), but it looks like I may have Ovulated on Saturday. My chart doesn’t show it yet since it’s only been 2 days of high temps, but I’m pretty sure that Saturday was the day.

 

I have an official appointment with a new OB/GYN on 12/22 for an initial evaluation for infertility. I think my insurance will cover the initial evaluation, but I’m not 100% sure, so this will be interesting to see what I’m billed for. But seriously, I’m 3.5 years into TTC, I ovulate pretty much every month with regular cycles and ever since I learned charting “timing” has been pretty spot on for the months we really focus on it… There just isn’t anything else I can guess would be the problem except maybe John or my weight. I do have PCOS, but it’s not that disruptive with my system. I’m afraid I may just fall into that “unexplained infertility” category.  I am not going to an Reproductive Endocrinologist yet because that is REALLY not covered by my insurance, but we’ll see what the OB can get away with that the CNM couldn’t.

 

I do hear random snippets of conversation once in a while from my mother-n-law about her children being a struggle to conceive. But I’m too much of a chicken to ask those probing questions about who the issue was with while TTC their 4 kids or if they had to see a doctor about it in the first place. I don’t know what the Infertility world was like back between 1976-1982. As for my parents they had 6 kids in 8 years so my mom never struggled with infertility and can’t seem to understand what my problem is. My mom is really no help to me most days, she just infuriates me when the topic of grandkids comes up. I guess I just need to suck-it-up and ask my mother-in-law the questions I want answered. Because if she and the father-in-law had problems conceiving their kids could that impact John and his fertility?

 

One of the ladies I talk to online is 11 weeks pregnant today. It is so exciting that she’s getting a beautiful baby. I’m still just waiting for my turn, but I have finally learned that it’s okay that I don’t have one, and it’s not someone else’s fault that I’m bitter. It’s taken a while, but I think I’m finally off the bitter train when it comes to babies… sure, there are still tears now and then, but not so much resentment as there once was. Now I’m just excited for all the new babies that are coming my way. :)

 

~*~*~

We are now into the Months of Horror in my house. Starting at Thanksgiving it’s nonstop holiday fun until February. . .  December – Ugh! – It’s one of those months that I dread all year long because of all the social events I’m expected to attend. I hate being social. But I had one Christmas party last week, one this week, two next week and the week after that is Christmas. Then New Years and then it’s January. To start, January 13 is my birthday, January 25 is my anniversary, February 5 is John’s birthday. Feb 14 is Valentines day… and by Valentines day we are burnt out with holidays so we usually don’t celebrate that one. It’s action packed fun, I tell you, but I’d give anything just to glaze over them and have it be April already. :P

 

It is currently between 18-25 degrees here in the day time and I just want to be in bed with some hot chocolate and a space heater. Ugh! I haven’t even started on Christmas cards this year. I think I might just do email cards and call it good. That way I’m saving stamps and trees… but I do like to get mail so I know that someone else on my mailing list likes to get mail once in a while too.

 

Hmmmm… what else? Well, today is my Lariann’s birthday . She would be 27… It’s been a weird day to say the least. I do okay most of the time until I look up and see her picture here on my cubicle wall. And then I get a little teary-eyed and I have to refocus on my work. John and I are taking his other little sister, Rachel, out to dinner tonight because this is the first December 7^th she has ever had to spend without Lari. Rachel’s birthday is on 12/22 and they were only 11 months apart so they had been together since the day Lari was born and she is having a hard time having her gone. So I have to give Rachel extra love today. She needs it.

It’s also weird to think that Scott is dating again. About 3 months ago he randomly dropped into conversation that he was on LDSSingles.com. I thought that was odd and wondered if it was his choice, or his dad’s. Then a few weeks ago he mentioned that he was dating someone. I mean, it’s been over 6 months since she passed away, but it’s still weird. However, I firmly believe that their little girl needs a mommy so if he is okay dating again, then I guess I am too. Nice thing is, is that he is currently dating someone I know and love so that makes it a little easier to agree with. Rachel is not happy about him dating, but she’s worried that he’ll get married and take Lucy and vanish into the night. He wont, but she worries. He hasn’t spent a lot of time with the family since Lari passed, but I think it’s because we remind him so much of her. He’s one of those guys who doesn’t like others to know what’s going on with him, or that he is hurting, but he misses Lari, and he shows it in a million little things that he probably doesn’t think anyone notices.

To night we’re going to her grave to mark the date. Mom wants to sing happy birthday, but I have issues singing Happy Birthday to a tombstone. I think I’ll just take her some flowers and call it good and eat one of the doughnuts provided. We’re going to dinner at one of Lari’s favorite spots “Javier’s” I think I’ll watch Moulin Rouge tonight when I finally get home, just to honor her.

 

Happy Birthday Lari.

HAVE YOU SEEN ME?

 MISSING:

 

Last Seen: ??? I don't remember... probably the last time John beat the game.

 

Edition : 2006 Product Dimensions: 8.25" wide x 10.50" long x 0.75" tall
Publisher: Random House Information Group Weight: 2.33 lbs.
Binding: Trade Paper
Number of Pages 432
Language: English

 

*Platform Specific -Written from the GameCube version of The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess * Every item is covered in Prima's Guide- All 24 Golden Bugs, 60 Poes, 45 Pieces of Heart, Fairies, Rare Gold Chu locations, Dig spot caverns, Overworld and Dungeon treasure chests, and every single Rupee location in the entire game world revealed. * Premier Maps -Exclusive maps for every Dungeon in the game * Pull Out Map -Giant poster map of the Overworld to help keep you oriented in the kingdom of Hyrule. *Linked Cover Art -Exclusive cover for the GameCube version of the guide.

 

If you have my guide, or know where it is, please return it to me, the rightful owner, and no harm will come to you.