Wednesday, March 2, 2011

The Saga of the Fridge


empty old fridge
Once upon a time there was a boy and a girl who lived in a house. This house was over 50 years old and had some issues, but this boy and girl made do and tried to make things better as the time passed.  
In this old house there lived an angry old fridge that liked to let everyone know it was angry by periodically making a loud Kerrrrrr-cHUnK sound. It did this several times a day, and also multiple times in the night while this boy and girl were sleeping. For the most part they ignored the angry fridge until one day (that happened to be a Sunday) Old fridge just decided it didn’t like them anymore, and instead of it’s usual Kerrrrrr-cHUnK it made a high pitched humming-rattling noise that drove the boy and girl (and the cats) crazy. It would rattle-humm for two hours then stop for twenty minutes then rattle-humm for two hours and then stop for twenty minutes…. And the pattern continued all day and all night and all the next day. But by the end of that first day, angry old fridge decided that it no longer wanted to keep the cold things cold, or the frozen things frozen so it let the frozen orange juice go squishy, and the freezer jam to melt.
the contents of my fridge
Now, this didn’t sit well with the boy and girl who lived in the house. They could put up with the angry old furnace that periodically Ka-Booms! As it starts to heat, and they were even putting up with the lack of hot water pressure from the bathtub faucet… but they would not put up with the angry old fridge that was refusing to do it’s job. So after a full nights sleep the boy and girl got up and went to work the next day. The girl spent all day researching refrigerators on-line, looking at prices, and brands, and sizes, and dealers… Eventually it came down to this. They needed a fridge. It needed to run. It needed to be quiet. It needed to be cheap. It needed to not have an ice maker. It needed to fit into the pre-existing spot of the old fridge… but most of all, they needed it NOW.

empty living room
So girl found a store that happened to be on her way home from work so she stopped there, walked in said, I need a fridge and I need it delivered tomorrow.  
empty kitchen w/old fridge

And the sales man said “I can do that.” So he showed her a fridge and she said “I’ll take it.” It wasn’t fancy, but it would do the job. So now, girl had to go home alone, (because boy was working ALL day,) and clean out the old fridge. Armed with coolers and ice girl emptied the angry old fridge listening all the while to it’s rattle-humm that was digging into her brain. Once everything was out she pulled the plug on that old monster and gave it a good swift kick.
Then she realized that she needed to do more work. There was only one way in and out of this old house and it was thoroughly blocked by the gathered possessions of this boy and this girl… so again, she got to work. Placing all the random chairs that gather at the table into various other rooms of the house she started moving things around in the kitchen. She yanked out that old fridge and knocked out some wooden trim that had previously adorned the cupboards and walls surrounding the fridge. She pulled out the computer desk and pushed, and scooted it across the floor with the subwoofer and printer in tow, all while trying not to knock the items and knick-knacks off the top.
She hauled the plastic drawers full of computer crap into the junk room and took a deep breath… but it still wasn’t over. When she turned around she saw how hideously dirty the floor was so she swept and swept and dusted the cob webs off the walls, and then for good measure she pulled out the steam mop and cleaned the entire floor as best she could. And yet she still wasn’t done. Next she moved to the hallway and removed at least three years worth of Christmas cards and pictures of family and friends that had been taped there. She took down her pictures and ripped out the taped down phone cord that belonged to the phone that no longer existed.
new fridge

She pulled down the picture frame and made a neat little pile and put it all on the previously moved computer desk… Then it was on to the living room. The path between the door and the hallway was strewn with obstacles. First she put away all the shoes that liked to gather together near the door and she told them to all stay put because she didn’t want to see them in front of the door for at least another twenty-four hours. The shoes all agreed and settled in to their now/old spots for the time being. Back in the living room the girl looked at the collection of CD cases and decided that they had to go too.
She pulled out her handy screwdriver and disconnected the brackets from the wall and pushed/pulled/rocked the CD case away from the wall into the middle of the room. Then she moved the lamp and the other case that is much lighter and not attached to the wall. That was it. The pathway was cleaned and there was nothing left to do but wait for the delivery man…. So the girl went to bed, and the boy finally came home from working. It was late at night. 
The next morning boy and girl got out of bed and got ready for the day… the fridge wasn’t supposed to come until the afternoon, but then the phone rang and the man on the other end said “I’m bringing your fridge now!” and the boy and girl rejoiced. 
new full fridge
It was a tight squeeze, but delivery-man got the old one out and the new one in pretty darn quick, and then boy and girl had to wait for it to cool before they could bust open the coolers and refill the new fridge. The new fridge was so quite and so clean, it made the boy and girl happy. It only took a few hours for it to get to temperature and again boy and girl rejoiced. Once the old food was in the new fridge girl decided she didn’t like the shelf placement, but she’ll have to fix that later there was to much else to do. Next it was into the living room… the floor was dirty so before anything was moved back girl had to vacuum. Then back to the kitchen where boy and girl used some cooperation and pushed the computer desk back into place and made the cords all nice and pretty and made sure the speakers worked. Then the plastic drawers came out of the junk room and resumed their place next to the desk.

all back together again

Then back to the living room where together they manipulated the heavy CD case back into place and screwed the brackets back into the wall…before realizing that the lamp cord needed to go behind the heavy CD case. So they unscrewed the brackets and put the cord in place and screwed the CD case back to the wall again.
 Then the lighter CD case went back into place. Boy hung the famed proclamation back onto the hallway wall, but alas, the pictures did not go back up. Finally, boy and girl put all the chairs back in their places and sat down for a deep breath. What a day… and it was only 11 am. Nap time.
The end.

2 comments:

Becky said...

Wow, that is a lot of moving things all for a fridge. I am impressed you put all the stuff back on the fridge. It took me weeks to put one magnet on our new fridge.

Jessica Pears said...

Any time you have some excess energy to burn head on over to my house. :) You're awesome!