Today's Capricorn Horoscope:

Aug 31, 2009

You are often a lot like a master of Zen who doesn't say anything to their pupils for months, until the day the pupils begin not to believe anymore, and find themselves becoming indifferent to the whole thing. Then the Zen master pronounces one or two phrases that are so incredibly true that no one knows what to say! As for you, dear Capricorn, you could be that Zen master today.

FOOD!! Brains!!! Brains!! Brains! Brainsssss.

Today's Capricorn Horoscope:

Aug 27, 2009

You have a tremendous amount of creativity bottled up inside you, dear Capricorn. Have you begun to let some of it out, like you promised yourself that you would? This creative cycle will last for the next month or so. Don't let this time pass without taking advantage of it. Use the other side of your brain for a change. Take up sketching, dabble with some paints and brushes, or try your hand at fiction writing. What you do is less important than that you do something. The simple act of creation, in whatever form, unlocks special areas of the brain.

Movies coming out that I want to see...

Gamer - 9/4

9 - 9/9

Zombieland - 10/9

Where the Wild Things Are - 10/16

Astro Boy - 10/23

A Christmas Carol IMAX 3D - 11/6

2012 - 11/13

New Moon - 11/20

Avatar IMAX 3D - 12/18

The Princess and the Frog - 12/25

Sherlock Holmes - 12/25

Just something interesting I came across

"What do I think God meant when he gave me infertility?”

"Couples experiencing infertility often receive well-meaning but extremely insensitive "advice." We can all list the most popular ones: "Just relax and you'll get pregnant," or "adopt and you'll get pregnant," of the most painful from those who think they've got the goods on God's plan, "Maybe God never meant for you to have children." The sheer audacity of making a statement like that never fails to amaze me.

"These same people would never walk up to someone seeking treatment for cancer and say, "Maybe God never meant for you to live." However, because I am infertile, I'm supposed to get on with my life. It's hard to understand that people can not see infertility for what it is, a disease for which I have to seek treatment. What if Jonas Salk had said to the parents of polio victims, "Maybe God meant for thousands of our children to be cripples, live in an iron lung or die." What if he'd never tried to find a cure? Who could think for one minute that that was God's plan?

"What do I think God meant when he gave me infertility?

"I think he meant for my husband and I to grow closer, become stronger, love deeper. I think God meant for us to find the fortitude within ourselves to get up every time infertility knocks us down. I think God meant for our medical community to discover medicines, invent medical equipment, create procedures and protocols. I think God meant for us to find a cure for infertility.

"No, God never meant for me not to have children. That's not my destiny; that's just a fork in the road I'm on. I've been placed on the road less traveled, and, like it or not, I'm a better person for it. Clearly, God meant for me to develop more compassion, deeper courage, and greater inner strength on this journey to resolution, and I haven't let him down.

"Frankly, if the truth be known, I think God has singled me out for a special treatment. I think God meant for me to build a thirst for a child so strong and so deep that when that baby is finally placed in my arms, it will be the longest, coolest, most refreshing drink I've ever known.

"While I would never choose infertility, I can not deny that a fertile woman could never know the joy that awaits me. Yes, one way or another, I will have a baby of my own. And the next time someone wants to offer me unsolicited advice I'll say, "Don't tell me what God meant when he handed me infertility. I already know."

Weird. I got to work this morning I found this random orange balloon turkey.

It's been a little while since I highlighted one of my real life heroes. Tonight I'm going to feature a man who was only in my life for a very short time, but has made a world of difference to me.
This is my friend Joe. He was an Elder in the Washington DC south Mission when we met. his personality and smile endeared him to me, but his spirit and his words bonded us together.
I recently had a run in with Joe on a social networking site. I don't think I have really talked to him in years, but as we exchanged pleasantries and news about life my heart was reminded of why he is so important to me. Joe has a way of putting the world into perspective and reminding me that I am better then I think I am. So to Joe (who I'm sure isn't going to read this) I just wanted to tell you that I love you, and thank you for reminding me that the spirit can shine through my eyes.

See the purple streak? Bad bandaid.

An email I never sent to a friend

Hi,

I just wanted to respond to your texts that I have gotten lately. Sorry I'm so slow to respond, but my phone has magically detached from my brain and I set it down somewhere on silent and don't find it again until the next day. So fear not, I'm not ignoring you, I just don't have my phone with me. 

So how are you doing kid? I'm alright. I've had a terrible and stressful month of July so much so that I missed girls night this month because I had my mind on a million other things. I'm stressed, depressed, burnt out, tired and grumpy. That's about the most honest answer to the question of "how are you?" that I can come up with. 

July was really hard for the family without Lariann. It's weird how you never really think about how a holiday with turn out without someone until you're forced to go through it. So yeah, the month was like a dragged out version of Lariann dying all over again. The Holidays where she is very-much missing and you think you hear her laugh or catch a glimpse of her from the corner of your eye. Then the Davis High School Marching Band being featured in both of the parades that I watched this season where the band just brings each of us to tears because Lari loved being a flag girl so much. And then the days in-between where you have nothing else to do but remember that she's gone and try not to cry over silly things like baby-sitting and songs on your iPod or even the movies you used to watch. And the fact that her tombstone has been a major topic of conversation with every member of the family. Then the whole month was topped off with a family trip to St. George to see the nephew that came home from his mission ... minus Scott and Lucy. So it was just an all around depressing month and since I have to go back to St. George next weekend for another nephew leaving on his mission it's just going to be another depressing reminder.

So yeah, I've been a little out of touch and more then a little vacant. I have taken to hiding out in my bedroom again. As soon as I get home from work I make dinner and then go hide in my room with a book or the X-Files or GI Joe and the Transformers cartoons. It's really quite sad but it's the truth.

So there you go, the truth about how I am and what I have been up to for the past little while.

None the less, I do miss you, and I love you very much and we really need to get together and do something. Maybe we can do movie night at your place and we can just hang out and not do anything of importance at all.

Alright, I love you. I'll talk to you later.

Love, Me

Dreaming of baby

I had a dream the other night that I had a baby. It was just before my period started and I've had these massive back cramps for the past few days. Apparently the cramps inspired me to dream that I was in labor. John was out searching for the "essence" of something and I was left alone with some strange lady and her kids in the middle of no where. But it all turned out fine in the end. I never did get to see my baby, but I named her Ruby Elizabeth.

 

However when I told John about it he voted no on the name Ruby.