Finally, after an 8 year break I decided that it was time to go back to writing the novel I started when I was in 8th grade.
It is titled Three Stupid Men and a Very Confused Girl. I had the plot laid out, every one had a code name and a back story, entire chapters had been written and if you ask me, I thought it was pretty good (I know, I'm bias). I recently bought a laptop so I could have something to do while John was on the computer, and vise versa. When I got the new addition to our family, I found a renewed desire to write, and to write one specific story ... My Spy Novel.
So I've looked for my notes - any notes - related to this story. I found some (very little) on my computer, but the bulk of the notes were in a reddish/maroon folder that I had been hand writing the story in since I was 13. I have looked at my mom's house, I have looked in my memoirs, I have looked in my cedar chest and even cleaned my extra bedroom to find this folder.... but it is NO WHERE. It is gone and I am again feeling the loss of something VERY important to me.
Maybe I'm just on edge from the traumatic events of the past week, but I literally sat down on the floor and cried the other night because it is gone and all I have to go off of are the first few chapters and some random notes.
woe is me.
I am seeing a pattern - everything I have loved in my life, people, pets, books, and my writings are all eventually taken away from m.
Yes, I know I'm only 29 and the rest of my life is still in front of me, but the past 10 years have been so full of loss and disappointment, I'm just not sure I'm ready for the next 50 years to be the same.
Is it really too much to ask that I could just have a nice, beautiful life with less death and hardship on my part??
Honestly, who throws a shoe.
2 comments:
Hey just wanted to say keep your head up, you are justion going through the normal part of life called, "being 29 going on 30" I know I went through the same thing, and so did scrat. Althought you can see it now, things get better after you turn 30 and start getting older. (yes I am still doing nothing today and I LOVE IT)
z might be on to something here. I know you've had a difficult time lately with circumstances that are out of your control, however, the big 3-0 is a hard number to swallow. I'm honestly surprised that z and I made it threw my hitting that #! Sometimes you just need a little down time to feel better. Now with all these extra years of experience you have on you, just think how great your book will be!
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